Letters to Gochi

Dear author of Kvan,

I have recently read your letters to Gochi. They are so impressive that I felt the urge to reply. I wish it were Gochi who replied to them. Anyway, pretend that I am Gochi.

First, I don’t know how to address you as you didn’t mention your name at the end of the letters. Usually, authors end their letters with their preferred names.

You have written many tough and painful things in your letters. If I were your therapist, it would be overwhelming for me to listen to them. It is too much. Thank God, there were some positive letters among them.

The one that hurt me the most was “Words about fear.” Psychology says that unless you make peace with your past and forgive your parents, you will have that fear. I think you have already forgiven. If not, you may want to reconsider it.

Do you know why you became Keating? Because once you were Martin too, who lacked Keating when you needed him the most. And then you became Keating for many Martins who were about to take their lives. I am also one of them, but I forgive everyone even though I am wrecked.

You are right about the three kinds of love. It is called the “Three Loves Theory.” Unfortunately, many people do not meet their third love.

It is not recommended to read Schopenhauer when you feel dark inside. How can you feel better while reading someone whose philosophy is pessimistic and who didn’t believe in real happiness? Try reading some positive things as well.

I am happy for your son for breaking the generational curse. Unfortunately, daughters can’t be David, partly because Goliath is the father himself, and partly because daughters can’t do it alone. Another reason may be that women hate being strong (as you mentioned in one of the letters).

Feeling lost is okay because it is a chance to reconnect with yourself. Love is not gone, opportunity is not wasted, and the people you cared about may be gone, but there are other people who care for you more than you can imagine, and you don’t even know about their existence.

I have bad news for you. It seems that you are having a midlife crisis, which can cause you to reassess your life, relationships, and feelings. Maybe that’s why you think she can be your third love. Do not take it cruelly, but I hope she rejects you. Because if she accepts, then the ending is clear. What is unclear to you is that you have no idea about the pain and regret that will come after. You can’t escape from yourself, and you can’t change the past.

Do protect your heart. And yes, love matters the most.

By the way, I was writing while listening to Yann Tiersen to feel the same pulse as you.

Take a good care.